The Mythical 25th Hour

I am pretty sure I am just about ready to have a cataclysmic nervous breakdown.

I stole a few moments last week to think about my daily and weekly schedule and I came to a realization. When I tell people I don't have time for something, I mean it. I literally do not have any more time available in my day, unless I decide to cut out sleep. Based on reports about sleep deprivation psychosis, I have determined that this is not a viable option.

This is a sample day in my life:

7:30 - 8:00 AM - Drag myself or flop out of bed to get ready and get the kids downstairs. Luckily, my son, who wakes up at the crack of dawn, has learned to entertain himself until I can fall out of bed. Unfortunately, his new morning routine includes waking up his sister and putting various toys into her crib with her.

8:00 - 9:00 AM - Get the kids fed and clean the kitchen from the night before. As much as I miss my husband and as much as I think he works too much, it never ceases to amaze me how much messier the house gets when he is home.

9:00 - 10:00 AM - Baths for the kids. Since Dad is only home in the evenings, they get their baths when he isn't home.

10:00 - 10:30 AM - Switch over laundry, vacuum, wash floor - depending on what needs to be done that day.

10:30 - 11:00 AM - Lunch for the kids. I am usually straightening or getting stuff ready for school, so if I do eat, its standing up.

11:00 - 12:00 PM - Take son to school.

12:00 - 2:00 PM - Put daughter down for nap and work like crazy for two hours. I usually get into a good flow about 1:45.

2:00 - 3:00 PM - Pick up son from school.

3:00 - 5:00 PM - Play with kids. Stress out about having to figure out dinner.

5:00 - 7:00 PM - Fix dinner, clean up after dinner, stare at clock waiting for husband to get home.

7:00 - 7:12 PM - Talk to husband and hand over kids.

7:13 - 10 or 11:00 - Work. Try to balance Pepsi consumption somewhere between having enough to keep my eyes open with at least minimal brain functioning without preventing sleep when I do actually make it to bed.

2 minutes after lying down - Fall into a coma-like state, which I like to call "black sleep." Technically you slept, but you certainly don't feel like it.

This is my schedule during the week. On top of this I have to deal with the usual family crises, like doctor appointments and runs to Target, and deal with my Mom, who just doesn't understand why I don't come over for lunch with the kids during the week.

This is why I need to find a 25th hour. I would love to work out, read a book or even get my eyebrows waxed on time, instead of waiting until I have a caterpillar uni-brow. But until I learn how to freeze time or find a watch like the one from the movie "Clockstoppers," it seems I am destined to continue to stagger through this period in life like a puffy eyed zombie looking for their next caffeine fix.